Happy Gilmore turned 20 years old this week.
Aside from making me feel old (I vividly remember my brother and I begging our parents to let us see the Adam Sandler classic when I was 12) I really enjoyed reading retrospectives such as this one about the movie this week. I don’t think I will ever stop quoting Shooter McGavin or Mr. Larson or any of the other hilarious characters from that film.
You hit that guy! He shouldn’t have been standing there.
Your fingers hurt? Well, now your back is going to hurt, because you just pulled landscaping duty.
This guy spends more time in the sand than David Hasselhoff.
I could go on and on. Apparently, so could some of you. I wasn’t sure what to expect when I asked for Happy Gilmore references tied into K-State questions this week, but y’all came through with questions worthy of a gold jacket.
With that, let’s get to them. It’s time for another K-State Q&A.
There a couple options. He could go with the classic Chubbs Peterson quote: “Alligator bit my hand off!”
There’s the Happy Gilmore line: “I’m stupid. You’re smart. I was wrong. You were right. You’re the best. I’m the worst. You’re very good-looking. I’m not attractive.”
Maybe he shows confidence and says: “The way I see it, we’ve only just begun.”
But the real answer can be found in the following video. This seems like the best way for anyone to describe the Big 12 this season.
That’s just a well-crafted question.
Let’s just say anyone yelling “that’s two thus far” is at risk.
Happy Gilmore had two claims to hockey fame: The most time spent in the penalty box, and the only guy to take off his skates and try to stab somebody with them.
Bruce Weber’s motivational claim to fame is that he told K-State players they were going to beat Oklahoma, so they needed to practice a proper court-storming before the game occurred. Then the Wildcats went out and beat the Sooners.
I am honestly a little surprised at how random Weber’s motivational tactics can be. I loved everything about the way he approached the OU game, but then he turns around and tells players before the Oklahoma State game that it’s almost Valentine’s Day so they should play with heart. That’s weak. But then he bounces back with a video montage before the TCU game. He needs to find some consistency.
You would like to see him accept blame for the loss, but by now it’s easy to tell that’s not his style. He likes to point the finger at something after every loss, and on those days he decided to point at his players. Maybe he was thinking, nothing else is working, so why not try this? Players didn’t seem upset about it afterward, and came back to beat TCU on the road. Kind of weird how it worked out.
Bob Barker, easy. The dude smoked Adam Sandler in his prime. But I do wonder what catchphrase Weber would use if he won. Probably something involving his favorite new line -- sticky fingers.
Now you’re really gonna be mad ... They rank even lower -- 334th nationally -- in three-point field goal percentage.
You hate me, don’t you?
Shooter McGavin is a good comparison for Bill Self. One of these days, he should hold a news conference Shooter style.
I’m not sure why, but I am going to say Bob Huggins is Mr. Larson. For some reason, I feel like you don’t want to get on his bad side.
I honestly think the Big 12 stays at 10 schools. None of the schools being mentioned as potential new members is a must-add, and even if you add them you are stuck trying to create equal divisions. I’m old enough to remember when reporters hounded Dan Beebe about realigning the old north/south divisions, because they were tired of watching Texas and Oklahoma trounce the north champion in a boring championship game. Things are worse now that Baylor and TCU are good.
Can you imagine a split of Baylor, Oklahoma, Oklahoma State, TCU, Texas and Texas Tech in one division and Cincinnati, Connecticut, Iowa State, Kansas, Kansas State and West Virginia in the other? Even if you sent the Oklahoma schools to the north division, the south would be the much stronger division. And even then scheduling is a nightmare, because you have to figure out how maintain all those old rivalries. I haven’t seen anyone talk about this, but it will be a challenge.
All that being said, I have heard the most chatter about Cincinnati, Connecticut, Central Florida and South Florida. I don’t think BYU is as strong a candidate as some suggest.
Personally, I would be happier with Houston than any of those schools, though it seems unlikely the Big 12 wants to add another Texas school.
At this point, I think we are better off projecting what it will take for K-State to reach the NIT. My thoughts: Two more wins could do it, and three more wins will do it.
A 4-1 finish would put the Wildcats back on the NCAA Tournament bubble, but they would also probably need a win or two in the Big 12 Tournament. They have a lot of ground to make up, but it would be hard to keep a 20-win team from the Big 12 out of the Big Dance.
If Dean Wade, Barry Brown and Kamau Stokes improve and Xavier Sneed is as good as advertised, K-State could be a much-improved team in a few seasons.
Until then, there is more than one way to get a Gold Jacket.
Kellis Robinett: @kellisrobinett