Dubious, bogus and utterly phony headlines

The following satirical headlines come from borowitzreport.com and theonion.com:

▪  Republicans Defend Right to Be Born and Immediately Deported

▪  Teacher Asks Students to Split Into 2 Groups to Simulate Ideal Class Size

▪  Out-of-Control Scott Walker Injured After Wildly Careening Between Stances on Immigration

▪  Guantanamo Bay Begins Construction on Senior Care Wing

▪  Amazon CEO Says Employees Lacking Empathy Will Be Instantly Purged

▪  KC Chiefs Rookies Forced to Lug Andy Reid’s Snacks to and From Practice

This story was originally published August 30, 2015 at 7:01 PM.